I've lost fat from not eating, and some muscle too, as my body tries to lower my metabolic requirements. I might have to engage in some aerobic exercise to get the flame burning again. I'd like some nice running shoes; I tried an intense regimen of jogging every day for a little while last year with the Zombies, Run! app. I think I went into it too hard off the bat, after about a week the pain in my feet and legs made me afraid that I'd hurt something. Maybe next time, when I can afford running shoes fit to me, it'll feel less like I've hurt myself.

I've also fallen off the wagon a few times. it turns out not eating for extended periods of time is difficult. I've heard willpower is like a muscle that grows stronger when you exercise it, so I 'm trying to avoid eating when I can. But at home, especially when the kids need watching and I can't distract myself with video games, the temptation to make a few delicious breakfast bagels or 5 bowls of cereal (because it's super easy) is too much. My doctor has suggested a blood pressure monitor, but that costs money too. I do want one though. Our bathroom scale is inoperative, apparently due to submersion in water (that's the drawback of smart scales, I guess). My wife did give me her old Fitbit, which I am enjoying, because I like tracking my data. I'm not so interested in monitoring my exact weight, though. I'd like to lose my stomach fat and love handles, that and a lower blood pressure is how I'd measure weight loss success. I feel like if I measure actual weight I'll be discouraged.

The fast food job is cutting hours due to SARS-CoV-2. I got there this morning and the manager on duty (who could stand to improve her work ethic in general - not really relevant, just a side note) opened the door and told me I wasn't going to be working that day. She could have called or texted, that would have been nice. I had gone to the local distribution center for a big box store in the area and asked if they were flexible on hours, and then applied online for early morning work from 2 AM to 7 AM. Being waved off this morning made me more confident in my decision. The distribution center pays almost twice as much as the restaurant anyways.

There's a section of the online application for assessment where they ask you questions to try and determine your personality. I feel like they're trying to assess how well I can tolerate bad coworkers and unrealistic targets, with an undercurrent of finding out how compliant I can be made. I think I'm going any promises made by management to be made on paper.

Gotta stop lounging on the bed during the half hour between showering after job 1 and going to job 2. I have a hard time getting going again after I lie down and then I end up with just the bare minimum of time to get to work.

To do:

Figure out how to save 15% for retirement

Finish sorting stuff in the basement

Why were my posts set with a Pacific Time timestamp? I don't know how long it's been like that, but I fixed it.

General life tip: you don't have room in your house or time in your life for every new thing that comes along, no matter how cheap or fun it is. Pick and choose.

For Lent, so far, I've been trying to eat as little as possible. Not with any spiritual goal in mind, but because I need to lose weight and hey, this seems like a good time to do it. I do like a smidge of tradition every now and again.

In general when I go on a not-eating binge, I make exceptions for social times, like if I'm with a friend and it's lunchtime, I'll go for something. I'll pig out at a potluck. I'll also eat anything my wife makes me. She's got the kids to deal with so this doesn't affect my calorie intake all that much.

I had some thoughts on hunger and willpower but my wife just came in and put a plate of chicken and green beans next to me and she is playing Ni No Kuni and it's hard to concentrate, and maybe I'm a little irritable from a long day with no food, but she's eating too and the chewing is bugging me a little more than usual.

Did you know your blood glucose levels drop right before you eat, because your body is trying to keep a huge influx of blood sugar from throwing your homeostasis out of wack? I learned that today. Maybe that's why I'm grumpy, there's a plate of food here that's ready to go. I can ruminate on human motivation later I guess.

I'm gonna get a start on organizing all the junk in the basement today. A lot of stuff that I've carted around for most of my life, some of it useful, a lot of it not. Time for all these boxes and totes to find closure. I did find my old Bop-It, maybe that still works. I'm heading out now to buy some more plastic totes and baggies for loose wires and cords. I'll pick up some AAA batteries and see if the kids can play with the Bop-It.