New kid's born, I have another son now. My wife stopped working, the kids are stopping daycare soon. I'm working 60 hours a week between two jobs. I work early mornings running a cash register seven days a week and then go to my main job, car sales, for the rest of the day. Picking up a third job on Sunday crossed my mind; there's a local appliance store hiring for sales and I bet it would be better than increasing my Sunday hours at the fast food place.

I wouldn't really need to, we're currently at survival levels of income, although that might change with extra expenses later (I'd like to retire too, the thought of spending the rest of my life working really bugs me). School costs come to mind. I'm perfectly fine with sending the kids to public school, but my wife wants to send them to a religious school of the christian denomination we're a part of. I'm not opposed to 'religious' education, it's not like they're smacking knuckles with rulers there, but it's not important to me and it's an extra cost. It's important to my wife, though, important enough that it'll be worth it. Her family also wants the kids to go there, and they've offered to help with tuition. I don't bristle at that offer of assistance as much as I do for others, I'm not sure why.

Maybe it's because I don't consider religious school to be a necessity. Help with rent and food and other things make that we need make me feel indebted. I don't mind someone dropping off a box of diapers or a toy for a kid or small things like that, but basically anything over ~$50 makes me feel uncomfortable. But the kids don't -need- religious schooling. Their grandparents (at least on my wife's side, I don't know how strongly my mom feels about it) think they do, so if they need to make it happen, I won't stop them. I guess that whatever part of me keeps the social ledger doesn't consider this a debt. I'm not going to try to rationalize it too much.

No more drinking, not since about a month before the new guy got here. Went to hang out with my friend at a bar for a few minutes after work the other day, had a Busch NA. It's still beer, and I'm not a snob, so whatever. I don't want to give myself a buzz in case something bad happens that I need to be 100% functional for, and I know that a buzz can lead to me piling on more alcohol until I'm not just buzzed anymore. I don't think I can really drink at any amount that I'd consider "responsible" until maybe when the kids are older, much older, like halfway through high school older. I miss weed too, and that's got an additional deterrent in the form of possible unemployment. Alcohol is much more likely to kill me, but it's legal, and it's possible to be a 'functioning alcoholic' and maintain a job. I've done it for how many years now? But I think now with the intensity of focus that bringing home the bacon requires, booze is out. I really do miss marijuana, but I think part of that is missing the days when there wasn't so much of a time squeeze and I could do what I liked without endangering anyone's food supply.

Speaking of piling on, I've been thinking it's time to jump back on the diet wagon. I lost thirty pounds (13-ish kg) in the last part of 2019, but I quit watching what I was eating early this year. So now the fat's starting to build up again. I'm not back to where I was, so I've still made progress, but I'm still technically overweight. Break's over, time to start putting effort back in.

I decided to just grab a hot chocolate for the wife and skip breakfast today. If I had a steady supply of willpower I could just eat a set amount of calories per meal, but if a day turns out to be particularly stressful then that plan's gonna go out the window and I'll be loading carbs until I feel better. So I'll save up a calorie deficit during the good times, and if I need something extra to help cope with the bad times, I'll still come out ahead.

Oh, also, I got the truck fixed at work. New tires, new tie rod ends. $600 and some change!